How to deal with self-doubt
Self-doubt plagues each and every one of us. It is part and parcel of the human experience. From starting a business or switching jobs to becoming a parent or saying yes to a new relationship, it is the voice in the back of our head screaming “go the other way”.
What is self-doubt?
Self-doubt is a lack of faith in oneself: a feeling of doubt or uncertainty about one’s abilities, actions, etc. It is an inability to trust one’s judgments and decisions. It is a mindset that holds us back from pursuing our dreams, living our best lives, and experiencing fulfillment. As a matter of fact, self-doubt could cause us to sabotage any opportunities or blessings that come our way
Tips for dealing with self-doubt
While I don’t think we will ever be free from self-doubt, we can certainly manage it. Here are some tips to do so:
Acknowledge it
You can never solve a problem unless you recognize that it’s there in the first place. So rather than ignore self-doubt it would be best if you acknowledged it. Recognize it for what it is, even when it masks as a voice of reason for why you shouldn’t take that next opportunity.
Accept it
Now that we’ve acknowledged our self-doubt, the next step is to accept it as part and parcel of the human experience. We will never not doubt ourselves. Self-doubt is the brain’s way of protecting us from harm and danger.
The brain is wired from decades of having to survive as a specie to protect us from potential pain and stress. It is the brain's job to keep us alive, so when it recognizes a threat, even if that threat is you taking up a new career or task, it tries to protect you. keep that in mind the next time you start to doubt yourself.
Additionally, sometimes accepting a thought, not obsessing over it or trying to suppress it but just sitting with it, is the fastest way to make it pass away.
Practice positive self-talk/ affirmations
Although, you cannot completely banish self-doubt from your mind by thought suppression you can introduce new thoughts. These new thought patterns will serve as a defense whenever you start doubting yourself.
So start by thinking about all the effort and consistency you will put into your new task, try to think of things going well and of you taking constructive criticism and slowly getting better. Affirm that you are worthy and capable of growth and that you don’t have to be perfect right away.
The more you practice these new thought patterns, the more your brain focuses on your ability to grow and become better as opposed to self-doubt.
Analyze it
After you acknowledge and accept self-doubt, you want to find out if there’s any truth. My mom would always say when people criticize you, check if there’s any truth to the criticism. This also applies to when we criticize ourselves. Put your emotions aside and see if there’s any truth to the criticism.
For example, if you have self-doubt about taking on a new role, what exactly do you doubt? Is it your ability to carry out the tasks efficiently? If yes, do you actually have the required skills for the role? If you don’t, then make a plan to upskill on the job, maybe take an online class or get someone to give you honest feedback about your work.
This way you not only soothe your emotions but you ensure that you succeed in the task which will increase your self-esteem in the end.
Give yourself permission to be imperfect at something.
Often with self-doubt, our excuse is that our delivery of said task won’t be perfect. We want to have the perfect ideas, perfect execution, perfect novel, perfect app, perfect blog post, etc. and although in our last tip, I said to analyze and fix the faults we can get stuck and stay there if we focus on perfection.
Take, for instance, Forbes contributor and Author Dr. Maggie Warrel, it wasn’t until she gave herself permission to write an imperfect book that she wrote her first book, which is now published and in six languages worldwide. In my own case, giving myself permission to be imperfect means, writing this blog post right now and not waiting for the perfect words or ideas.
So give yourself permission to be a novice at something, a beginner, someone that needs a lot of correction. Give yourself permission to try, fail and try again. Even with the self-doubt in your head and your heart racing, do it anyway, the more you do it, the better you become and the less self-doubt you have.
I really hope these tips help you tackle self-doubt. And until next time, have an amazing day!